


Carpe Noctem

by LittleLightLittleFire



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Fluff, M/M, WinterFRE, unrelated
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-12
Updated: 2017-04-12
Packaged: 2018-10-18 03:30:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10608381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleLightLittleFire/pseuds/LittleLightLittleFire
Summary: Kili is used to living under the noisy neighbour from hell. The same cannot be said for the new guy next door...A WinterFRE prize for rillaelilz





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [rillaelilz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rillaelilz/gifts).



_UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ_

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" groaned Kili, flinging his pillow over his head to try and block out the noise that reverberated through the ceiling.

He had thought that after the last time and the petition signed by the _rest of the damned building_ , his upstairs neighbour would have gotten the message that trance music at 3AM was not a particular delight shared by everyone. 

Especially not so loud it could be heard through four feet of solid concrete. A jet engine could have taken off by Kili's window and he was pretty sure he'd still be able to hear it. Kili could have been _dead_  and he would still be able to hear it. 

He knew from last time (and the time before that...and the time before _that)_ , that there was not a power on heaven or earth that would get Upstairs to stop until he'd exhausted himself. So, with the most death-wishing glare he could muster, Kili rolled out of bed and flicked on the lights. 

He made himself a cup of tea and turned on his games console, setting the volume so that it was just about audible over the racket. Zombies were not exactly the things he wanted to kill at that point, but they'd do for lack of a more accessible and less illegal option. 

"OI! You with the shitty music! _OI!"_  a man yelled, just outside Kili's front door.

The design of the building, a circle of apartments with their front doors leading out into a central, open air-atrium, meant that every _single_  noise echoed. If the rest of the building hadn't been woken up by Upstairs' din, they would definitely be woken up by the man's yelling. 

Pausing the game, Kili shuffled over to his door and stuck his head out. 

"It won't do any good," he said, making the man jump. 

"Huh?"

"It won't do any good," repeated Kili. "You've just got to wait him out."

"This is fucking ridiculous," said the stranger. "I'm calling the police."

"Won't come," Kili mumbled around a yawn. The man looked at him incredulously. "Inner city, weekend night, they've got bigger things to be dealing with. Or so they tell me."

The man shot daggers at a point somewhere above Kili's head and Kili took the opportunity to give him a quick once-over, taking in the messy, blond bed hair, beard and blue eyes. Not to mention the flash of hip bones and toned stomach where his sweat pants had slipped down slightly. 

Shit. Probably not gay. Might be gay. Fuck it, thought Kili. Carpe diem. Noctem. Whatever. 

"This is your first time dealing with Fucknuts, isn't it?"

"Yeah, I moved next door just last week."

"Welcome to the neighbourhood," Kili said sarcastically. "I'm Kili."

"Fili," the man replied and shook his hand. 

"How about that? Fili and Kili!" said Kili and then cringed internally. Nice one, dipshit. 

"Is there really nothing..."

"Nope. Can't get up to his floor without a fob. Building management can, but they won't come out until morning. Police won't come. Council won't do anything except send him a letter. It's 'not frequent enough', _apparently._  Believe me, I've been here three years and, short of decapitation, I've tried _everything."_

Fili huffed with annoyance and scratched his beard. He shivered and Kili saw an in. 

"Brew?" he asked. 

If it all went horribly wrong, Kili thought, he could always blame it on sleep deprivation. 

Fili considered the offer for a second then shrugged. "Might as well, it's not like I'm going to be getting to sleep any time soon..."

_Nailed it._

Kili stepped aside to let his new friend pass. He even smelt good. Like salt and wood and fresh air. Fili wandered through the flat, unprompted, to the kitchen and Kili followed behind, sniffing dreamily. 

He flicked on the kettle and started absently making more tea. He even used the fancy mug for Fili's. 

"What is it?" asked Fili, as Kili handed it to him. 

"Sorry, I was on auto-pilot. It's just builder's tea. I can make it again, if you like..."

"Nah, I'm good with this, thanks."

Kili was rewarded with a grin and a flash of dimples. Momentarily incapacitated, Kili managed to slosh scalding tea over his fingers.

" _Ow,_  shit!"

"You ok?"

"Yeah, fine," muttered Kili as he scrabbled for a cloth. "It's not my evening, that's all."

"Tell me about out it," said Fili with a sigh. "I've been on nights all week and I was hoping to catch up on sleep this weekend and reset my body clock. But then _this_ dickhead..."

"Nights? Are you a doctor?"

"Paramedic, actually."

"Oh, wow. That must be...interesting?"

"'Interesting' is definitely the best way of describing it," said Fili with a chuckle. "Nights are great, hard work though, especially around a full moon."

"Werewolves?"

"No, you chump - although, that might be easier to handle. The full moon sends people a bit loopy for some reason. We get our _weirdest_  calls on those nights."

"Right," said Kili, feeling the embarrassed blush start to recede from his cheeks. "That would make more sense than werewolves... So, what was it this week?"

"Guy ate his iPod nano."

" _What?! Why?_ "

"Full moon fever," explained Fili, like it was the most obvious explanation. "What about you?"

"Me? I'm a history professor at the university."

"No way! What kind? And aren't you a bit young? I thought professors were all tweed-wearing old blokes or something."

"Norse. And no, I'm not. Academics aren't  _all_ crusty old men."

"I bet if I had a rummage in your wardrobe I'd find some tweed though," said Fili, smirking over his mug. 

That was definitely in the vicinity of flirting. May _actually_  be gay, after all. And _interested._  Kili blushed again, partly at that, partly because Fili was right. 

"I'll have you know that it's a very sturdy and underrated material."

"If you say so."

 

With the lull in the conversation, the bass line from Upstairs seemed to expand to fill the silence. Fili groaned. 

"His taste in music is singularly shit."

"Sadly, yes." 

"I can't believe you've not moved out sooner, dealing with this all the time."

"It's not _all_ the time. More like once every couple of months. Besides, this place is cheap."

Fili nodded and they both sipped their tea. The noise was like an itch that Kili needed to scratch; if he didn't, he was going to go insane. 

"That's it, I'm putting a film on."

"Oh," said Fili, looking a little disappointed. "I'll get out of your hair then."

"I was just about to ask if you like to stay, actually. As long as you don't mind films with lots of explosions and not much dialogue."

"Sure!" Fili's face lit up and Kili's stomach lurched in response. _Definitely_  interested. 

"Um...Star Wars or Die Hard."

"Star Wars," answered Fili at once. "Maybe we can learn the Force by osmosis... break the sound system upstairs."

"More tea?"

"Hells yeah. You make the best cuppa I've had in years... And, you know, we need snacks for this. Back in a sec."

Leaping of the couch, Fili dashed off to his own flat. Kili waited at least until the door had clicked shut before erupting into a frenzy of celebratory dancing. Briefly, he contemplated writing a thank you note to Upstairs if this all panned out, but thought better of it. It might encourage him. 

When Fili returned, Kili already made the tea and was loading up the DVD player. He heard the door latch click and popped his head around the corner, only to be confronted by a walking snack mountain. 

"I bring an offering of scran, O Brew Wizard," said Fili, muffled by a box of Pop Tarts. 

Kili had seen less junk food at an eight year old's birthday party. 

"Before you go thinking I'm a fat bastard," Fili said, helping himself to bowls and plates for his hoard of crisps, cakes and biscuits, "- which, I _am_  a little-" Fili poked the tiny pudge on his otherwise perfectly toned stomach and Kili had to make a concerted effort not to let his eyes linger for too long. "- High calorie, low effort food is like mana in my job. I barely get time to piss some days, let alone _eat."_

Kili examined at a box of chocolate cookies. "Well, these definitely fit the high calorie description."

Nodding enthusiastically, Fili grabbed them from under Kili's nose, tore open the packet and stuff a cookie, whole, into his mouth. After he finally managed to swallow the first, he fished another one out and regarded it philosophically. 

"This was not my plan for this weekend. But, if I'm not able to sleep, I'm going to eat my entire body weight in biscuits and there's not a soul in the galaxy that is going to stop me."

"I take it that's my cue," said Kili with a grin.

" _Please._  Save me from this terrible music. You're my only hope."

Kili shook his head, suppressing a smirk at the awful joke. 

Fili was un-self-consciously and delightfully weird, oozing confidence and swagger, and Kili knew that he was falling hard. _Already._ It was a good job he'd seen the film a thousand times before because, with Fili there, his concentration was minimal at best. 

It was somewhere around the last act of New Hope that Kili noticed Fili had fallen asleep, cuddling a packet of Pringles. He didn't have the heart to wake him up, so Kili pulled a blanket from his bed and carefully swapped the Pringle tube for a pillow. With no sign of the music stopping and feeling too wired to sleep, Kili changed the DVD for Empire Strikes Back. He knew the script in his sleep and it formed a comforting and familiar soundtrack. Eventually, Kili too fell asleep. 

 

He awoke to blessed silence and the soft light of dawn on his eyelids. Warm and cosy, he wriggled down, savouring the feeling. Then the warm and cosy squeezed him. 

With a feeling of dread, Kili cracked open one eye. In his sleep, somehow, Kili had managed to end up lying mostly on Fili, who had abandoned the pillow in favour of something cuddlier. Him. 

If he moved, he risked waking Fili and facing potential -read, extremely _likely_  - awkwardness. If he stayed, Fili would eventually wake up and then there would be awkwardness anyway. He could just pretend he was a _really_  heavy sleeper...

"Where going?" mumbled a voice near his ear. 

Shit. Shit shit shitting _shit._

"Er...nowhere?"

"G'd. S'nice." Fili squeezed tighter. "Mmm. You smell good. Like trees."

Fili sighed and his breathing evened out as he went back to sleep again. 

Kili was, for all intents and purposes, stuck. There were worse places. Resigned to his fate, Kili lay his head back down and drifted off himself. 

 

Movement underneath Kili roused him this time, as Fili eased himself off the sofa. He settled into the warm patch that Fili had vacated. Then he heard the door click shut and the nice, sleepy morning feeling suddenly evaporated. 

Well, _fuck._

Kili sat up, sour rejection turning his stomach in knots. It was irrational, it wasn't like they'd _done_ anything, not like a one-night stand that had cut and run... and yet that somehow made it worse. 

Fine, fuck him, Kili decided. He'd wallow in self pity for a day or so and eat the large amount of food that Fili had left behind in his rush to escape. It would go some way to easing the sting. 

There was a scuffling at the front door and Kili snapped his head to look.

Trying to be as quiet as possible whilst laden with several packets of food, Fili was easing himself round the door. When he saw Kili staring disbelievingly at him, Fili grinned. 

"Morning! Thought I'd repay your hospitality by cooking you breakfast. I got eggs, mushrooms, bacon..."

"You don't have to do that!"

"No, I don't. But I want to," said Fili, dumping the food on the kitchen counter and beginning his hunt for utensils. He glanced over at Kili and did a double-take. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," mumbled Kili. 

"If you want your space, you just have to give the word and I'll get out of your hair," said Fili, not unkindly. 

"No! No. It's just- I thought-" The knot in Kili's throat had him struggling to speak. 

"You thought I'd just done a runner," Fili finished. Kili nodded silently, too embarrassed to speak. 

Fili sat next to him on the sofa and took one of Kili's hands in both of his. 

"I wouldn't go without saying something. You deserve more respect than that." When Kili didn't move or respond, Fili drew back. "Shit, I'm sorry. I thought you- I completely misread things. I'm _so_ sorry."

Carpe noctem, thought Kili. Diem. Whatever. 

Fili's rambling apology was interrupted by Kili planting a kiss on his mouth. Their teeth bumped and they both had terrible morning breath, but Kili through it was just about the best thing he'd ever stolen. 

Fili looked slightly stunned when they broke apart. Kili chuckled and patted his knee. 

"Now, about that breakfast..."

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed this!  
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated :)


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